George......

[HoseHead]

Can you help this person find a job? He seeks an executive position. Will be available in January 2009, and is willing to relocate.

RESUME WORK HISTORY

Law Enforcement

I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.

Military

I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL.

I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.

Oil Industry

I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.

Sports

I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.

Public Office

I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.

With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.

Accomplishments:

I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union.

During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.

I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.

I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.

President of the United States

With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.

I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.

I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.

I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.

I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.

I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.

I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market.

In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month. I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.

I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President.

I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.

My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.

My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.

I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.

I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.

I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.

I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.

I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history.

I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.

I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history.

I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.

I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.

I refused to allow inspector's access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.

I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).

I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any President since the advent of television.

I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period. After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.

I garnered the most sympathy ever for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.

I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind.

I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens and the world community.

I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families in wartime.

In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends.

I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security. I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster, "a WMD.

I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.

Education

College:

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

I was a cheerleader.

Records and References:

All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view.

All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.

All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.


GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, DC 20520

[Bfowler]

the cheerleader is the worst part...lol

[Mastiff]

.....

[fuzzysnuggleduck]

Canada can post whatever it wants!

And seriously, who the ever listened to/cared what Bill Lumberg had to say? Certainly not Peter, our faithful protagonist

[Bfowler]

Certainly not Peter, our faithful protagonist

[Mastiff]

true but it just gets fucking old...the bush bashing that is......I mean when was the last time the american side bashed Canadas leader?

it not like i am a 100 % bush fan boy but comeon give it a rest

[fuzzysnuggleduck]

I mean when was the last time the american side bashed Canadas leader?

Please, please, please, please do that.

[stipud]

I mean when was the last time the american side bashed Canadas leader?

Please, please, please, please do that.

Yeah, he sucks too.

But America doesn't care about anyone but themselves, so you would never bash our leaders

[Mastiff]

But America doesn't care about anyone but themselves, so you would never bash our leaders

Its not that I hate you guys bashing our leader its just the same repetitive bullshit over and over...... and no as a whole we don’t bash yours because he doesn’t make the world news with his decisions at least not our news.

In short on the world scale I guess your leader doesn’t register…. Must be nice to fly under the radar.

[stipud]

Do you even know our Prime Minister's name?

(No cheating on google )

[Bfowler]

so you would never bash our leaders

America isnt your leader?

[stipud]

so you would never bash our leaders

America isnt your leader?

Canadian dollar is 1.07 USD now...

Bow to your new Canadian overlords.

[Bfowler]

the rise in the canadian dollar is my doing.

im trying to inflate the cost of canadian goods to motivate US consumers to boycott canada

[stipud]

the rise in the canadian dollar is my doing.

im trying to inflate the cost of canadian goods to motivate US consumers to boycott canada

It's working too... GM is going to cut a lot of it's employment in Ontario (AGAIN). They are cutting out the PT Cruister convertible, Dodge Magnum, and Chrysler Pacifica, as well as a few other Jeeps and stuff. About 12000 jobs will be lost on the whole, and i'll bet you anything the vast majority will be from Canadian plants, due to that extra 7 cents on the dollar.

Canadian shops are also continuing to gouge us by charging more than the US price, because they "had to buy it with a lower dollar", neglecting the point that they can replenish their stock at a fraction of the cost now. And that if they lowered prices more people might buy from them... thus allowing them to buy EVEN MORE stock to sell in the future.

Oh well, it's all horseshit anyways... the dollar won't be staying this high for very long. I guess I should stockpile gear while it's cheap eh?

[Bfowler]

or make friends with people who can hook you up!

12000 is a ton, Jesus.

at least there is a mixed blessing in there. the pt cruiser vert is an abomination

[Mastiff]

Do you even know our Prime Minister's name?

(No cheating on google )

nope dont know....and that proves my point....whats more i dont care to find out his / her name...sry too bussy caring about myself.