Im becoming mormon, congratulate me

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:02 am

So I found out that in the UK now there are laws protecting people and their religious beliefs. So, I figured like all those pakis and polish people who are taking the piss with it I would too.

So, from this day on I am mormon, which will confuse the absolute fuck out of the british, and I am going to use it so that I get all kinds of governmental grants and dont have to do a shit job.

Post by **mr tibbs** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 4:37 am

<----------speechless

Pedi · Post by **Pedi** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 4:41 am

Post by **Rold Gold** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 6:15 am

I'm currently bangin an LDS bishop's daughter......

Post by **mr tibbs** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:49 am

FuzzyHoNutz wrote:I'm currently bangin an LDS bishop's daughter......

That's not very difficult around these parts.

Post by **Rold Gold** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:06 am

It isn't is it..........

LDS chix are always the partiers... Party friday and saturday night and hit church on sunday to wipe the slate clean.

My first BJ was from a LDS chick..... The lord is my shepard and he knows what I need..............

OldSchoolFool · Post by **OldSchoolFool** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:08 am

Wow, and to think, in this country you can make fun of people's religion without being brought up on hate crimes. Wonder how that works in UK?

Post by **fuzzysnuggleduck** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:20 am

What grants, exactly, are you planning on applying for?

Religious grants are often more complicated than "give me money". You usually have to prove that the money did something besides get you drunk for a few months straight...

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:32 am

In the UK they will force you to do work, any work. So Ill just say my religion forbids that, and theyll leave me be.

Also, they must make allowances based on your faith and stuff

Their problem will be they will have absolutely no idea what the hell a mormon even is

Its mostly for a bit of fun (and to ridicule and take advantage of the stupid PC manner over there) but tbh I can see it working to my full advantage.

I saw this movie the other week and this guy said he was hindu. movie was set in a prison, so they had to give him his own room because he told them he wasnt allowed to sleep in the same room with another dude IIRC, and they had to give him special boots and shit because he said he wasnt allowed to touch leather..

Was fucking hilarious.

Post by **Rold Gold** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:34 am

Hate crimes?????

Who's making fun of mormons? Personally, I love my mormon. She's the best woman I've ever known so I made her my wife.

besides, who doesn't have a "mormon chick" story?

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:55 am

I dont, sadly.

Actually the religion seems pretty cool, if not for the fact its totally flawed. But hey, they do seem really happy

And Joseph smith became a prophet dumb dumb dumb dumb dum

Post by **stipud** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:58 am

OldSchoolFool wrote:Wow, and to think, in this country you can make fun of people's religion without being brought up on hate crimes. Wonder how that works in UK?

You have a pretty narrow view of Europe. Have you ever lived there? It's actually very nice. Despite how much bureaucracy they have there, I have always felt far more free living there than in Canada, where there is less government interaction. Now, I have only lived in Germany Holland and Sweden, but my visits to the UK have always been free of hassle.

If I could ask you a favor, unless the thread is talking about hate crimes in the UK, I don't think you should be plugging your political agenda like this. You have spun a few politically unrelated topics into "bash the Europeans" threads lately. If you want to get into a political argument, there's the Politics Megathread in the lounge for that.

We keep these discussions there, in order to avoid the political flaming in areas where we should be staying friendly. This is a car audio forum after all... while we all have very different backgrounds, religious and political beliefs, but we come here for our love of the same thing. I have found that political threads only do more harm than good here, by separating people who would normally get along in any other circumstance.

Now, regarding the thread topic.. I'm with Pedi...

x2

Pedi · Post by **Pedi** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:00 pm

I think you are on thin ice here pandy. It cannot be that easy, FGS, we live in 2008???

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:15 pm

Pedi wrote:I think you are on thin ice here pandy. It cannot be that easy, FGS, we live in 2008???

In the UK the PC crowd are so vocal that it is that easy.

Youre not allowed to remove a womans veil if shes muslim, and I just found out mormons wear special underwear. So, that would like totally get me out of ever being strip searched by the cops because noone is allowed to see your boxers, theyre sacred

Also, in the UK no cop is allowed to put his fingers in your mouth, or make you remove a hat or shoes.. those are considered items of clothing and thus, they need a warrant before they can remove them (which means arresting you on suspicion etc, way too much paperwork).

Remember Pedi, Im only having a bit of fun mate, the basic reason I am going to do it is because I need a new kneecap fitted in the UK, and, I dont want the government trying to force me to work whilst I recieve disability. I will simply say that my religion forbids me to work from home.

I also need 2 teeth capped, and my back sorted out. This would normally cost me but on disability it and any prescriptions I need would be 100% free, I can also get free quit smoking aids (like patches and so forth).

I reakon with my back (might need surgery) and knee (do need surgery) Ill be off my feet for about a year. And tbh I want to spend time catching up with my beloved family (because theyre the shiznit) and seeing people I havent seen for the best part of nine years.

Without being harassed lol.

Post by **mr tibbs** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:21 pm

Good hell, if your looking for a religion to just be a smart ass go for a Pastafarian!!! Check it out!!

OldSchoolFool · Post by **OldSchoolFool** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:58 pm

Stipud
I think you take a rather narrow view of my responses here.

After all, in the last one I was directly responding to USA bashing. I didn't start that one. But hey, who's counting.

You win- No more EU bashing, only bash USA and SUV's- deal?

Post by **Bfowler** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:11 pm

and audiobahn.

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:12 pm

OldSchoolFool wrote:Stipud
I think you take a rather narrow view of my responses here.

After all, in the last one I was directly responding to USA bashing. I didn't start that one. But hey, who's counting.

You win- No more EU bashing, only bash USA and SUV's- deal?

I think what he was pertaining to was the fact that it seems you didnt let it drop and brought it into other, unrelated threads. That can and will become and issue on any forum.

The way I see it is this, you said some stuff about the UK that just wasnt true. I said some stuff about the USA that was, or at least from what I have seen from living in both. Once that was done the thread was locked because afterall this isnt political debate forums, its phoenix forums.

I had forgotten all about it tbh, live and let live and all that shit. New dawn new day.

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:13 pm

Bfowler wrote:and audiobahn.

haha ya fucker you stab me in the heart

Post by **Bfowler** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:17 pm

Post by **stipud** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:05 pm

OldSchoolFool wrote:Stipud
I think you take a rather narrow view of my responses here.

After all, in the last one I was directly responding to USA bashing. I didn't start that one. But hey, who's counting.

You win- No more EU bashing, only bash USA and SUV's- deal?

Sounds good to me.

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:27 pm

hey someone sang a song about me too !

Warning, this song is offensive and downright rude.

Post by **Rold Gold** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:31 pm

The underware you speak of is called "Garments" and there blessed.

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:33 pm

My underwear is blessed, you should see whats in there !

ydnap · Post by **ydnap** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:34 pm

Whats pink and wrinkly and hangs out your underwear?

mother...